Damn, I'm old

25 signs you've grown up
(brought to you by Jenn... or at least an e-mail from Jenn)
* Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

* Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

* You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

* 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

* You hear your favorite song on an elevator.

* You watch the Weather Channel.

* Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.

* You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

* Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

* You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

* Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

* You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

* Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.

* You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.

* Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

* You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.

* Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

* Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

* You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

* A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."

* You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

* "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again."

* 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

* You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar!

* You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you!!!

(Well, the whole list doesn't apply to me... but a lot does. Man, this is depressing.)