Sponsor me!

Will someone please sponsor me to do nothing? I excel at doing nothing and can provide many examples of times when I have done so. References are available upon request. This nothingness includes relaxing at home, traveling, watching movies, etc... basically anything that does not involve actual work.

Why you should sponsor me
I could be part of a study on boredom. Research on me could provide insight into how to do absolutely nothing and never become bored. People everywhere could be taught these secrets and happiness around the globe would skyrocket. Wouldn't you like to be the reason for all this goodness?